Symptom

I guess lately I have been feeling a little depressed. Really this is just a symptom of what has been going on in my life. Last year ended on a low. Mind you I have yet to find someone who loved 2016…

Mine was tough and every now and then I get a little down. For me it is a crushing low that leaves me distant and unable to connect. I have a feeling that others would shake it off but I don’t normally get depressed. So when it happens it can really takes me by surprise. It shouldn’t, but it always does.

But this week I saw my counsellor (yes I am seeing one and yes they do help) and she said, “That’s okay. It’s allowed.”

That stumped me. Surely I ought to be happy and cheerful all the time. Surely I ought to not let people know when I cry?

The answer was that I can be sad. It is normal. It is a symptom of me getting better. And I am. My sadness isn’t something all consuming. I can still laugh and have fun with my family and friends. That underlying river of sadness is still there, but it isn’t ruling my life. It is something that I can jump over sometimes.

Sure there are times when I cry and become maudlin, but there are times when I am happy. A really close friend said to me the other day :

“You have to feel the lows so that you can experience the highs.”

I think he was right. I think that I agree with him. Sadness is a symptom, but it isn’t the problem. It comes and goes like a tide. All I got to do is sit on the beach and wait for it to go out. Because it will. As surely as the sun will shine.

Inspired by the daily prompt: Symptom.

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