Shock

I was in a dream. And in that dream I was walking down a dirt road. I remember thinking that it ought to be yellow. But then I realised that it couldn’t be. I was the witch and not the innocent girl.

I turned and behind me I saw that the road was crumbling into nothing. It wasn’t darkness it was just nothing. I once lost my peripheral vision due to a virus. Most of it came back but I didn’t notice it had gone until a car had tried to overtake me and I didn’t see it until it was past me. Very scary. Well, this disappearing road was like that. I just couldn’t see it anymore.

I turned back and walked a little faster. A bird flew near me.

“What are you doing?” it asked.

“Staying ahead of that.” I motioned behind me. I didn’t feel it was odd that I was talking to a bird. It was a dream.

“It will never get closer.”

I laughed and started to run. I shot a look behind me and realised that the missing path was no further back nor any closer.

“I told you,” the bird said.

I slowed to a walk again, happy this was a dream, because I’d be out of puff in real life.

“Stop,” The bird said.

I did and closed my eyes. I wasn’t swallowed. I opened my eyes and the bird hovered in front of my face.

“What is it?” I asked.

“Your fears…”

*     *     *     *     *

feather

And then I woke up. Okay, I know I have strange dreams, but this one actually makes sense. I am doing a lot at the moment and most of it is scary and new. I have recently read at an open mike and tomorrow I go to sell my wares at a show. I have done many shows before now, but this is the first with my book. I am scared. But excited at the same time.

This morning, at breakfast, I realised how surreal my life has become. I mean, I didn’t learn to read until I was 11 and now I have one anthology published, a children’s story with an agent (they may or may not want it), another anthology on the way and I am writing a novel. Even in my wildest nightmares or dreams I never imagined that this is what my life would be.

I think I am in shock, because the last day I have moved through it as if I’m watching it on a large screen rather than living it. But it is becoming more real for me. Now all I have to do is remember that my fears, and I have a lot due to a fertile imagination, are my own making, and although I can’t escape them, they can’t catch me unless I let them.

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