I remember the film. I watched it with my brother and I couldn’t believe when Marty McFly grabbed hold of the car bumper and sped along on his skateboard. At the time we lived on a cul-de-sac and all the kids in the street went skateboard mad. My brother got a yellow and red one with the picture of a wolf on the underside. The kid across the road just had a plain one and was by far the most successful at the jumps, twists and tricks.
Me? Well, I have a slight balancing problem , thanks to the dyslexia, so I couldn’t even stand on one without falling. I got used to falling. But I think it was my biking that made me feel different.
I must have been no more than twelve at the time and, although I was badly bullied in school, my main problem was that I couldn’t ride a bike. Our family had no money so by the time we could afford it they bought two bikes. Me and my brother were to learn together.
We didn’t have a big garden but it was long, so my brother goes first. He sits on the bike, which has stabilizers, and is gone. Then me. I tried and although I wobbled it wasn’t a problem. Hey, four wheels is not an issue.
They looked like this on both the bikes. Anyway one week later my brother has his removed. And he is away, gone. He could ride a bike as easily as that.
Me? Well, I was more like a fish out of water. I couldn’t balance. At school I was also having problems. The two combined led to me hinging everything on my bike. Strange I know but I was a child and it was how my mind worked.
It took me two months to balance without stabilizers, and by the time I finished I didn’t care that I still felt left out. I could ride. And I did, everywhere. It didn’t matter that I was the one left out, because I had my own space. I could jump on my bike and blow away any problem. I left behind the bullies and school work and became just a girl on a bike.
I didn’t stop cycling until I went to uni, and since then I haven’t got on one. Now I am scared. You see, I still can’t balance and my fear is that I will fall. And I have found that as you get older the fear of falling becomes more pronounced. Maybe if I put my stabilizers back I could carve my way through the air again. Perhaps.